There are so many times that I just want to bottle up a moment and never let it go.
Its late and I'm so tired so I don't have time to write a lengthy, deep, mushy post even though that is totally whats in my heart right now so please just bare with me....but I do want to get out what I'm feeling before the craziness picks back up tomorrow morning.
You are so incredible one on one. You have incredible *minutes* when its you and Carrig, but for the most part you are a normal 3 yr old, older brother, vying for attention, not wanting to share toys or mommy's love. Fair enough. Sometimes I still get that way too.
But when its just you and I, or you and daddy, it is something special. Today, it was you and I at the chiropractor's office :)
We were there for over two and half hours which was A) absolutely ridiculous and B) something they apologized profusely for because they literally forgot we were sitting in a room but C) one of the best afternoons I've had in such a long time with you. You were so happy and sweet and talkative and imaginative and outgoing and cuddly and loving and oh I could go on. We sat and read for a good while in the waiting room, then you read the book back to me (you are really getting good at that these days), I "drove" you to Nana and GiGi's houses multiple times on my legs (good workout moms if you are looking for one) and you had fun conversations with respective families and dogs (the curtains in the waiting room). We played "sleepy time" and told secrets on the table in the room (mommy might have almost passed out 2 different times). We sang songs about the bunnies you were eating. We had a brief anatomy lesson with the skeleton (I remembered more than I thought I would and YOU kept pulling up my shirt to see if I had bones like the skeleton. Sorry for the show, patients and drs who kept talking by but never came in our room). We talked about our upcoming trip to New York (you are very excited to go to the fire station and see the horses) and we played more times than I can even count right now "up high....down low....in the middle - TOO SLOW". That is a clear winner in your book.
Finally the dr came in and it was a weird experience and not sure we will be going back to that office BUT that doesn't matter because you and i had the best time. I couldn't stop kissing you and telling you how awesome you were when we left because that is HARD for an active little 3 yr old boy to sit and behave for that long of a time... We even got to go to Dollar General and pick out a new car as a special treat because you were just.that.good.
You give me a run for my money, little man. You are a tough kid but all those hard times and frustrating moments are obliterated from my memory when we have an afternoon like this one. The bad is bad but it makes the good sooooooooo good. I think this way about your speech as well - I will never EVER take for granted a conversation or your endless chatter because I know what its like to have a kid that doesn't speak well and can't communicate what he wants. I will never EVER take for granted the sweet moments, the moments that you just grab my heart and give it a good squeeze because I live the hard moments every day.
Declan, I just love you more than anything on this earth buddy............being your mom is without question the hardest thing I have ever done and my guess is will ever do, but oh my, the payoff is priceless. You are my perfect little baby boy. Forever. Thanks for the sweet date to the weird chiropractor ;)